I stand amazed

In 8 days life as I have known it will change for good. My 2nd born daughter will be leave my home. She will become a wife to a wonderful young man chosen perfectly for her. Sorrow and joy mingle together in my heart. It's been a year of change, a time of saying "goodbye's"

My daughter got engaged 3 days before my father met Jesus face to face. Five months later my oldest daughter moved across country. In 8 days my 2nd "chick" will leave the nest.

Much has changed in these last few months. My mind tries to wrap around it all sometimes. Sadness mixed with rejoicing has been the journey. Jesus has been found there waiting in the midst. He has wrapped me up in His embrace until the pain subsided. He continues to enfold me as I watch my children leave my home one by one. A new day dawns. I wait in expectation knowing that Jesus will find me and pull me tight in His embrace as He & I together embark on a different trail. My days of mothering as I've known with these two will move to a different place.

It wasn't long ago that I wondered how in the world we would pay for a wedding on such a shoestring budget. I stand amazed at how lavishly Papa God has met each need.

My favorite story is of the wedding dress.

One Sunday in April, we went wedding dress shopping. I asked David, "what do I do if she finds a dress?" He said, "buy it and we'll figure it all out later." She found the wedding dress of her dreams. It was on sale at a very good price, yet I wondered how it would all work out. I've never been one who's been good at hiding what's going on inside me. As I made the purchase I hoped my concerns wouldn't show on my face.

My husband works for the telephone company here in town. Due to the economy, overtime has been eradicated. It's seldom that anyone gets any. But on this particular week, following our dress shopping, David happened to be on call, which meant he would get a little overtime. It would not be near enough to pay for the dress but maybe it would help.

At the end of the week a storm front came through these Georgia mountains, leaving people with all types of telephone, cable, internet problems. David was called in. He worked over 20 hours of overtime. The amount needed to pay for the dress was in the next paycheck. I stood amazed. It was as if Papa God was saying to me, "Rest Jewel, I've got you covered." He painted a picture of HIs heart, allowing me to see that His provision can be found even in the storm.

It's been that way all along. One thing after another has been covered. I stand amazed.

In the midst, I have been changed, yet even more. For once again, I have seen the hand of God in it's brilliance. He has come to reveal deeper truths in the midst of my inner struggles. As I have watched Him cover each detail of my life I am reminded, He holds me in His hands. All the while a deeper rest has come for my soul.

His beauty permeates my being as I find Him each detail of life. I'm finding in the deepest places of my soul that He has each and every facet of my life covered. The snapshots of His heart before me are more stunning than sometimes my mind can conceive.

We started out on a shoestring budget, we are ending with the wealth of a deeper knowing of the extravagant heart of a Father who loves.

I stand amazed!

Kevin & Courtney - October 3, 2009

©copyrighted: 2009 Julie L. Todd